Dear Sarah,
I hope you're getting used to the environment by now. I know it's not easy but you're doing veryvery well dear. Just take your time and be assured that all of us are around, though it could get suspiciously quiet and lonely at times (that's when i update this blog..hehe)
I thought of writing your birth story in all its glory and gory details..(I thought of this while I was on the delivery bed). But then again, why should I? Looking retrospectively, I should be veryvery grateful that it went the way it did and there's nothing much to describe anyway cos it was one quick one.
As I noted earlier, towards the end of my pregnancy, things were not peachy and rosy. It was excruciating pain almost every day. I was feeling heavy and on really bad days, i cant even move cos it was too painful for me. Then on Sunday morning (29th March) i went all weak and was bedridden due to high fever. The bug even got to Abg Amir and he was down with flu too. That night was Papa's worst nightmare, Abg Amir was having high temperature and vomitting while I was sobbing in pain (migraine and body aches) and couldnt say (bad sorethroat), eat or drink anything.
The next day, I suddenly realised that you were not moving actively in my tummy. So we went to the hospital, leaving sickly Abg Amir with Tok Ma with veryvery heavy heart. I was admitted, suspected dengue. Doc asked me to rest and stay in till all the tests are cleared. Again Papa hardly slept since he accompanied me at the hospital while checking on abang every now and then. The next day (Tuesday 31st March), we almost got a green light to leave since all my test showed that i'm cleared of dengue. My fever has almost cleared too. But suddenly the ECG showed that your heartbeat was irregular. We ran the test again and again untill Doc is convinced that it is nothing to be fearful of, so off we went back to pick up Abg Amir (who is also getting better by now).
Things got better from then on. On the way back, we detoured to Jln Bellamy for ikan bakar lunch (just for the record). Then back at Tok Ma, I managed to settle some office stuff and play with Abg Amir. I remembered being veryvery happy upon reaching home that night. So happy that we're finally back home in good health after 2 nites of misery. But I am also very aware that I have been experiencing some mild contraction ever since we left hospital that afternoon, so instead of calling it an early nite, Papa and I repacked our hospital bag (which was prematurely used the nite before).
10.00 pm - I called Tok Ms to get her to sleep early cos I dont feel good and we might be in for a long day again tomorrow. Coincidently she was at a neighbour house who just got back from Umrah bearing kurma nabi and air zam-zam for me and Yaya.
10.30 pm - Tok Ma and Tok Pa came over to drop the dates and air zam-zam.
11.00 pm - Finished packing, contraction is every 20 mins and it got stronger too.
11.30 pm - Papa went to shave cos the last time we took pic with Abang on fhis birthday, papa was very scruffy looking.. haha. By now, it hits me that i'm in labour - when i'm not fit enough for such hard work, when Abang is still sick and that means Tok Ma and Tok Pa wont be by my side in the hospital (yes, i'm a spoilt child right to the delivery bed). I felt really scared and cried but quickly consoled by clean-shaven Papa.
12.00 pm - We drop Abang nd kakak off at Tok Ma and head to the hospital. I told Tok Ma to stay at home and look after Abang instead of following us to the hospital. Kissed and salam Tok Pa and Tok Ma and asked for their forgiveness. Abang who were soundly asleep earlier woke up just in time to wave us goodbye. Once again, i was scared and I cried. I remember thinking of the worse and what would happen to Abang if i didnt make it. I know, i'm morbid sometimes.
1.00pm - We arrived at the hospital at 1 a.m after stopping by McD on NKVE (just for the record - we didnt have anything since the ikan bakar lunch).
1.05am - We were ushered directly to the delivery room. Most of the staff working then were from the afternoon shift, so they immediately recognised me. I was examined. Only 1-2cm dilated. Contraction is every 10 mins by now.
1.45am - Nurse offered epidural but I asked for pethadine instead. It takes them forever to adminsiter the drug since I couldnt keep still due to the ongoing contraction. I was also dehydrated by now but the nurse couldnt get the saline drip going since she couldnt find my vein. As a result, i got poked at 4 different places on both arms to no avail. Asked Papa to eat cos I didnt want my only pillar of strength to pass out of hunger in the middle of it all. But the Coke was a bad idea. Because his burping annoys the toot out of me especially in that situation.
2.00am - Contraction came back to back. Pethadine does not work since I did not have a breather in between the contractions. Doc arrived and examined me. I was 8cm dilated already. He broke the waterbag and estimated that we'll get down to the pushing business within 1.5 hours. He was wrong. As soon as the water gush out, I immediately feel like pushing.
2.30am - Almost everything prep up. Was asked to hold the push. I remember being quite 'noisy' by now. Then came the cue, ok, start pushing now. And with that green light, I suddenly forgot how to push.. haha
3.00+am - I felt you crowning. Doc asked to stop pushing while he does his thing (checking the umbilical cord i think). When he asked me to give one last good push, I did and the next thing i know is that familiar feeling of relieve as a huge mass of warmth slide out of me.
And there you were, laying restlessly on my tummy. I stroke you and suddenly panicked when you didnt cry. But seconds later you let out a big wail and continue crying till everything were done. It was the best sound a mom could ask for, how ironic!
Sarah, when I first saw you I remember briefly counting your fingers and toes. I remember your teeny tiny curls that I have hoped for. I remember your prominent nose. And your (our) trademark red pouty lips. You were perfect my dear. And while i'm taking all these in, I remember Papa crying and kissing my forehead again and again. God has granted every single wish I have asked for. A quick labour, a healthy baby, another chance to carry and safely bear a child for Papa.
Alhamdulillah. I am truly blessed.
Sarah Suffiya, welcome to the world my dear.
